Blog for Better Living

Gender Identity Basics: Understanding Non-Binary, Transgender, and Gender Fluid People

By: Michael Toohey, Psy.D. | December 4, 2020

Chances are you will encounter someone in your life, if you haven’t already, who is non-binary, transgender, or gender fluid. Knowing what this means, and how to be respectful of people’s differences is important. Understanding these terms can be hard, especially if you are learning these concepts for the first time. This article will discuss […]

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Bullying, LGBTQ+, Relationships

Teens and COVID-19

By: Michael Toohey, Psy.D. | September 11, 2020

Teens have difficult times during COVID-19. They miss seeing their friends and classmates in person. Socializing with peers is an important part of teen development while COVID-19 creates a social distancing challenge. The big letdown of not attending graduations, proms, sports, or college visits means many teens feel frustrated, depressed, irritable, annoyed, and sad. Healthychildren.org […]

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Depression, Parenting, Teens

Allyship

By: Michael Toohey, Psy.D. | June 19, 2020

Our country is in a state of unrest, as protesters take to the streets in support of racial equality. As we watch events unfolding on the news, we feel anxious, stressed, afraid, and for some…determined: determined to make things better for people of color. Many of us, however, are unsure what to do or where […]

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Anger, Anxiety, Grief, Racial Justice, Therapy, Trauma

And We Danced . . .

By: Michael Toohey, Psy.D. | May 1, 2020

Over the past few months, the COVID-19 virus has had a tremendous impact on the world. I see people overwhelmed, stressed, anxious, and afraid of intimate contact with others outside of their family or housemates. Although COVID-19 presents as a novel experience for many, gay men like me see it with a lot familiarity. We’ve […]

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Anxiety, Grief, Stress, Therapy

Transphobia

By: Michael Toohey, Psy.D. | March 27, 2020

Trans folk in our country are under attack. Multiple states have tried to pass ‘bathroom bills.’ South Dakota even tried to pass a law that would imprison for up to 10 years any medical provider who assisted a minor with transitioning. Last October, Time magazine reported analyzing 10 million social media and online posts over […]

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Bullying, Depression, LGBTQ+

LGBTQ+ Folk, Substance Use, and Self Esteem

By: Michael Toohey, Psy.D. | January 17, 2020

The holidays have come and gone having brought socializing and cheer in the form of anything from eggnog to champagne to cannabis to harder substances too. While the general population might increase alcohol and substance use as a means to celebrate the season, research shows that the LGBTQ+ community increases use of such substances not […]

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Anxiety, Depression, LGBTQ+, Substance Abuse, Trauma

LGBTQ+ Holiday Survival Guide

By: Michael Toohey, Psy.D. | November 8, 2019

The holidays are times of joy and sharing, and so it should be for the LGBTQ+ community too. The holidays for that community can include times of particular stress as we return to our original families to celebrate the season. Some families show more affirming acceptance than others. The holidays present stress for many although […]

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Anxiety, Family, Holidays, LGBTQ+

Together, We are Stronger: Remembering the Stonewall Riots

By: Michael Toohey, Psy.D. | August 23, 2019

This year, the LGBTQ+ community celebrated the golden 50th anniversary of the riots that marked the start of the modern LGBTQ+ movement. The riots occurred in the early hours of June 28, 1969, at the Stonewall Inn on Christopher Street in New York City. Three women of color, Marsha P. Johnson, Sylvia Rivera and Stormé […]

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Anxiety, Depression, LGBTQ+, Relationships, Therapy

The Alphabet Soup of Sexual and Gender Diversity

By: Michael Toohey, Psy.D. | May 24, 2019

In 1969, after the Stonewall Riots — the violent demonstrations by gay community members in response to a New York City police raid at the Stonewall Inn in Greenwich Village — did men and women in sexual minorities become vocal and active in defining themselves. ‘Gay’ was the first all-encompassing term. It applied to anyone […]

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Anxiety, Depression, LGBTQ+, Substance Abuse