Blog for Better Living

Understanding, and Overcoming Perfectionism

By: Niyatee Sukumaran, Ph.D. | July 26, 2024

Some of us wear the label “perfectionist” as a badge of honor. It can be considered a positive quality, showing that we are and pay close attention to detail. What isn’t as well understood is that perfectionism can do more harm than good. It can damage our self-esteem and confidence, put a strain on our […]

What Are Your Emotions Trying To Tell You?

By: Shanni Tal, Psy.D. | July 19, 2024

Emotions are a natural part of being human, yet they are often perplexing, can be unpredictable and difficult to understand. If you grew up in a household that didn’t acknowledge a range of emotions, it may be hard for you to identify, and express your feelings. This can lead to feeling disconnected, problems with your […]

Why Is Leaving So Hard?

By: Natalie Rice-Thorp, Ph.D. | July 5, 2024

How To Feel at Peace With Your Decision During a recent chat with a Swiftie about the wisdom in Taylor Swift’s song, “It’s Time To Go,” I started thinking about what it’s like to leave something that no longer serves you. Whether it’s a romantic relationship, a friendship, a job, or something else, I […]

Do You Shy Away From Your Feelings?

By: Kristen Lipari, Ph.D. | June 28, 2024

How To Understand Your Emotional Cues As a psychologist who treats strong and resilient women, I often hear my clients say that they try their hardest not to cry. They push their feelings away in hopes of avoiding the pain. Emotional repression is a common defense mechanism, especially if you live, or grew up […]

Coping With Perfectionism Using RAIN

By: Niyatee Sukumaran, Ph.D. | June 21, 2024

As a psychologist, I’ve talked with many clients who are trapped in an endless cycle of not feeling “good enough” because they set excessively high standards for themselves. Although there is absolutely nothing wrong with striving for excellence, the tendency to aim for flawlessness negatively impacts a person’s life. This tendency is referred to as […]

I’m an Accomplice

By: Michael Toohey, Psy.D. | June 7, 2024

Long before I was a psychologist, I was a volunteer and worked with all sorts of queer people. I remember volunteering in Hawaii almost 30 years ago, and one of the local volunteers was a trans woman. She was in the process of transitioning, and to get the “approval” of a psychiatrist to fully transition, […]

Anxiety, Depression, LGBTQ+, Therapy

The Dual Nature of Change: Why It’s Hard Yet Crucial for Growth

By: Jen McWaters, Psy.D. | May 3, 2024

Change is often met with resistance, yet it has an undeniable power to shape and transform our lives. The ability to navigate and embrace change is crucial to foster growth and flexibility in all areas of our lives. In this article, we’ll explore why change is hard, but necessary, and how you can adopt a […]

Anxiety, Personal Improvement, Stress

How to Reduce Anxiety During Medical Appointments

By: Kamaljit "Sonya" Virdi, Ph.D. | April 26, 2024

If you worry about meeting with a medical health provider, and find yourself avoiding scheduling medical appointments, you’re not alone. Going to the doctor can be nerve-wracking for everyone, and for some, medical visits can produce overwhelming fear and anxiety. This article provides strategies to help you reduce anxiety before and during a medical appointment […]

Anxiety, Stress

Self-Soothe Using Your 5 Senses

By: Natalie Rice-Thorp, Ph.D. | March 15, 2024

Have you ever felt SO mad, sad, or frustrated that you don’t know what to do with yourself? In these moments, what tools and coping skills do you have to manage your emotions effectively? Do you use alcohol or other substances to calm or numb yourself? Do you lash out at loved ones or pick […]