Blog for Better Living

How Can I Tell if My Therapy is Working?

By: Rochelle Perper, Ph.D. | September 10, 2021

When I meet with clients for the first time, I ask whether they have had therapy before. If they answer ‘yes,’ I ask what was helpful or not helpful in that experience. I often hear people say they felt like they just vented to their therapist and didn’t get anywhere during their sessions. Surprisingly, many […]

The Effects of Childhood Trauma

By: Rochelle Perper, Ph.D. | August 27, 2021

When we think of childhood, we typically associate feelings of security, love, optimism, and joy. Feeling protected and cared for during our childhood not only allows us to develop a secure sense of self but also healthy relationships later in life. Unfortunately, not everyone grows up feeling this way. Even if you had a generally […]

Are My Problems Big Enough for Therapy?

By: Rochelle Perper, Ph.D. | August 13, 2021

Some clients say they’re ‘just being silly’ when they talk about their problems during therapy. This tells me my clients regard their concerns as unimportant, not valid, or that they do not deserve care and attention. If this is something you’ve heard yourself say, or something others have said to you, you do not stand […]

Traumatic Grief in the COVID-19 Era

By: Rochelle Perper, Ph.D. | May 28, 2021

The COVID-19 pandemic has already altered the way we live, work, learn, and relate to each other. The many types of losses we’ve experienced during this time include financial insecurity, relocation, separation from family and friends, racial trauma, and losses of intangibles such as a sense of normalcy. The virus has also dramatically changed a […]

Grief, Trauma

It’s Okay Not to Be Okay

By: Rochelle Perper, Ph.D. | January 29, 2021

More than ten months have passed since the first stay-at-home orders in March 2020. I still have days when my anxiety feels overwhelming, when fear makes me irritable and easily upset, when fatigue overcomes me, and when I struggle to find beauty in the world. I sometimes wonder “What’s wrong with me that I can’t […]

Grieving the Loss of the Holidays: Managing Expectations During COVID-19

By: Rochelle Perper, Ph.D. | December 18, 2020

As COVID-19 cases continue to increase across the country, for most of us the holiday season will look different this year. The safest way to celebrate is at home with the people you live with. This means foregoing the parties, visits with family and friends, and participating in community activities and celebrations. We face the […]

Grief, Holidays, Stress

Get Comfortable with Being a Beginner

By: Rochelle Perper, Ph.D. | August 28, 2020

I’m not ashamed to tell you that I recently had a breakdown. I cried, got angry, and in no uncertain terms threw a temper tantrum that rivals that of a three-year-old fighting bedtime. The surprising thing is that my tantrum occurred in response to my husband trying to teach me the right way to do […]

Anger, Anxiety, Personal Improvement

How to be Patient with Yourself and Others in a Changing World

By: Rochelle Perper, Ph.D. | July 10, 2020

We live in a time where everything can change at an accelerated pace. No protocol exists for a time like this, no wisdom upon which to rely or set a course to follow. If ever there was a time when we should show patience, it would be now, right? After all, we’ve never done this […]

Why You Should Get Help Now

By: Rochelle Perper, Ph.D. | June 5, 2020

The COVID-19 pandemic has altered every aspect of our lives. From access to health care, our work, education, how we socialize, and how we take care of ourselves, we feel that the world has changed. It has, and it changed quickly. We know it’s temporary, but recovery feels like forever. Those experiencing losses by death, […]