A Therapist’s Wish for 2026

For many of us, this year has been marked not only by personal challenges, but by collective ones as well. As both a psychologist and a person living through this same moment in time, I find myself reflecting on what actually helped me navigate the year, not perfectly, but honestly, when things felt heavy, uncertain, and overwhelming.

Rather than offering resolutions (those who know me understand why I tend to avoid them) or neatly packaged advice for how to “do better,” I want to share three lessons that continue to stand out. These are not rules to follow or goals to achieve. They are gentle reminders for how to navigate challenging times and relate to ourselves and the world more authentically. My hope is that we bring these lessons with us into the year ahead, meeting it with a little more steadiness, compassion, and courage.

Lessons Learned From a Year That Asked a Lot

This year has asked a great deal of us, shaped by ongoing uncertainty, unpredictability, and change. The lessons below reflect how to stay grounded when things feel unsettled, continue showing up with care, and move forward even without having all the answers.

Lesson One: Find Steadiness by Spending Time “In”

This year reminded me that steadiness is not about avoiding struggle. It is about staying present with it. When life feels unpredictable, uncertain, or emotionally heavy, our natural instinct is often to run away from what feels uncomfortable. We try to distract ourselves, push through, fix things quickly, or stay constantly occupied. While this response is understandable, avoiding our inner experience can actually cause distress to last longer and feel more intense over time.

One practice that has helped me cultivate steadiness is something Dr. Dan Siegel refers to as “Time In.” This refers to a mindfulness-based practice of turning inward and spending intentional moments noticing our emotions, sensations, and thoughts. By slowing down and paying attention to what is happening inside us, we build self-awareness and begin to understand our emotional cues. Although this practice can feel challenging at first, especially when emotions are heavy, over time it tends to ease tension more quickly.

What Spending “Time In” Looks Like for Me:

• Allowing space for uncertainty without rushing to resolve it
• Prioritizing rest over productivity, while noticing and gently working to release feelings of guilt
• Returning regularly to grounding practices like breathwork and yoga
• Letting “enough” be enough on difficult days

We often talk about resilience as something active and visible. But sometimes resilience is quieter. It looks like staying with yourself, tending gently to your inner experience, and choosing not to abandon yourself when life feels heavy.

Lesson Two: Let Go of What We Can’t Control and Lean Into What We Can

One of the most challenging and meaningful lessons of this year has been learning to practice “Radical Acceptance.” Coined by Dr. Marsha Linehan, radical acceptance is the idea that, at its core, accepting difficult or painful circumstances can actually help us feel better. This may seem counterintuitive, especially when things feel unfair, overwhelming, or deeply disappointing. But pretending that everything is fine when it isn’t requires enormous effort. When we avoid what we are truly feeling, it depletes us rather than restores us, and it often keeps us stuck.

What acceptance is, and isn’t:

Acceptance does not mean resigning ourselves to feeling bad forever, and it certainly does not mean approving of what has happened. Instead, acceptance is an active stance. It helps us regulate our emotions so that we can think more clearly, care for ourselves more effectively, and eventually take meaningful steps forward. Paradoxically, change often becomes possible only after we stop fighting reality as it is.

For me, this lesson is built directly on the practice of spending time “in.” Once I pause and notice how I am feeling, the next step is to accept my current experience rather than arguing with it or wishing it away.

How to Practice Acceptance:

• Pause to notice how you are feeling, without resistance
• Validate your experience by reminding yourself, “Considering what I’ve been through, it’s understandable that feel this way”
• Approach yourself with curiosity and compassion by asking gently, “What do I need right now to help me through this pain?”

Grounding Phrases When Acceptance Feels Hard:

• “I feel sad/discouraged in this moment, and calmness and growth will follow”
• “Pain cannot be avoided, but I can choose how I care for myself through it”
• “I can learn something new even from experiences that cause me pain”
• “When I accept the reality of my situation, I can find creative solutions and healthier ways of coping”
• “I can’t change what led to my current reality, but I do have the power to influence what comes next”

Acceptance is a quiet but powerful choice to stop exhausting ourselves by resisting what we cannot change, and instead to turn toward what we can influence with care, clarity, and intention.

Lesson Three: Practice Gentle Courage

Courage is often portrayed as bold, decisive, and fearless. This year taught me a quieter, softer, and more honest version through the practice of setting and honoring boundaries. This kind of courage asks us to be truthful about how we are really doing and to stay emotionally open, even when it would feel easier to shut down or push through.

This has not come easily for me. Like many people, I spent years ignoring my own needs in order to fit in, keep the peace, or prioritize what felt best for others or the group. People-pleasing patterns can be hard to unlearn. Lately, I have been working to notice these moments more clearly and to tune into what I need, rather than automatically attuning to what is best for everyone else.

When we begin to identify our needs and take them seriously, it can feel both empowering and unsettling. If you grew up with the message that there was not enough room for your needs, or that they didn’t matter, speaking up can feel especially scary. You may worry about rejection, being reprimanded, or being labeled as “difficult.” These fears are valid and usually come from a real place of pain.

What Has Helped Me Practice Gentle Courage:

• When times feel especially challenging, sometimes the bravest thing I can do is ask for help. When I struggle to find the right words, I return to a simple phrase: “This is what’s best for me.” I offer it to you as well, as a reminder that prioritizing your needs is not selfish.
• When I feel overwhelmed or unsure, I remind myself that boundaries allow us to show up as our best selves. Caring for ourselves is not separate from caring for others. It is what allows us to be present, authentic, and meaningfully engaged in our relationships, roles, and commitments.

If you find these lessons hard to implement, or difficult to follow through on when they are tested, you are not alone. Asking for help and setting limits without guilt or over-explanation are practices I continue to work on myself (yes, I really do strive to practice what I preach). I believe that greater openness and honesty with one another allow us to support each other in practicing gentle courage and to offer encouragement, even in moments of fear and self-doubt.

Carrying These Lessons Forward

As we look ahead, it would be lovely if we could expect more calm, certainty, and predictability in the year to come. I know I would happily sign up for that! Unfortunately, life does not tend to cooperate with wish lists. What we can do instead is learn how to meet life as it is and feel better equipped to cope when things feel uncertain or unsettled.

This year has reminded me that meaning is still possible in times of uncertainty, that we can practice the art of being present and patient with ourselves and others in a changing world, and that we can continue to build strength through adversity.

If you take nothing else with you into the year ahead, I hope you carry this: you do not have to do everything at once, and you do not have to do it alone. Progress can be gentle. Strength can be quiet. And choosing to care for yourself, for others, and for what matters most is always enough.

We’re Here to Support You

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or unsure how to move forward, working with a professional San Diego psychologist can help you navigate life transitions, build emotional resilience, and reconnect with your values. At Therapy Changes, we believe in meeting you exactly where you are and providing caring, evidence-based care, with respect for your unique journey. Together, you and your therapist will work collaboratively to develop practical tools you can begin using right away for healthy coping during challenging times.

Contact us today to speak with our Client Care Coordinator about how therapy works, what to expect, and be matched with a talented member of our team.

I wish you and your loved ones steadiness, kindness, and moments of ease in the year ahead. May this new year offer space to release what you can’t control, practice gentle courage, and find grounding, even in uncertain times.

Photo by Robert Bye on Unsplash