The Hidden Truth Behind Where to Find Real Motivation

How many times have you thought, “If I could just get motivated…”? You might try making lists or searching online for inspiration. You may even tell loved ones about the things you want to accomplish and the changes you want to make. Despite your efforts, motivation often doesn’t appear. When that happens, it leaves you feeling frustrated and disappointed, far from motivated.

Want to know the secret?

Mainstream culture has it backwards when it comes to motivation. It’s not always true that we must feel motivated before we act. In fact, it’s actually the opposite! First, we act, and THEN we feel motivated, and then we act some more. Once we gain momentum, things become easier, which feels rewarding and boosts our motivation, and that helps us to keep going. You might be thinking, “But sometimes I do feel motivated first.” If that’s the case, great! If that’s not, that’s OK – you can still build momentum regardless of how you feel in the moment.

Follow these steps to jump-start your momentum for change:

Step 1: Pick your first target behavior.

This is not the time to make a comprehensive list. If you already feel like a snail stuck in molasses, seeing a long list might feel overwhelming. When you Set Goals You’ll Actually Achieve, like starting with small things that you can do with minimal effort, you’ll gain much needed momentum. Maybe you want to take a walk after work, make your lunch for work the next day, or put away the laundry more expediently. You might, for example, decide that you want to take healthy meals to school or work each day. To make this goal more achievable, start by taking either a fruit or vegetable snack with you to school or work every day.

Step 2: Find a behavior you already do and piggyback.

The “piggyback technique” is using an already established behavior or routine and “piggybacking” a new behavior onto it to help reinforce positive habits. For example, if you already routinely come home and drink a glass of water, feed the dog, bring in the mail, etc., you can use that routine to keep your momentum going. You could, for instance, decide to pack your fruit or vegetable snack right after feeding the dog.

Step 3: Get your supplies and stage your area.

It’s important to keep your supplies and a prompt close to where you engage in your established routine behavior to achieve your goal. In this case, you could put your fruit on the counter above the dog dish and place a reminder on the dog food package (“pack fruit/vegetable now”). If you are using fresh produce, you might consider also having some dry options as well in the event you run out of fresh options.

Step 4: State your new rule out loud, including what, when, and where.

In this scenario, it could be “I will pack a fruit or vegetable in my lunch bag right after I feed the dog every day after work. I will not sit down or do anything else until I put the item in my lunch bag.”

Step 5: Any feelings are fine.

You can observe your feelings, but you don’t need a particular feeling to be present before you get moving. You can feel sad, mad, glad, or ‘meh’ about work that day; it really doesn’t matter for this task. You can put a piece of produce in a bag while you feel any feeling.

Step 6: Celebrate and repeat!

Congratulate yourself on getting a jump-start on your motivation! Savor your victory, no matter how small. Go you! If it’s a target behavior to be repeated, do it again tomorrow.

Keep going and don’t give up! Remember, consistency is key – it helps build momentum and keeps you moving forward, even on the tough days. Every small step counts!

Optional Step 7: Build more momentum.

Once you have incorporated the target behavior into your routine, you can add to it by increasing the complexity, frequency, or number. If you successfully bring fruit to work every day, you might decide to add some nuts or go wild and add a main dish😊.

The good news is that even when we feel unmotivated, the small steps that we take can lead to big results. Even better, we don’t have to feel a particular way to get started. If you need help deciding where to start and how to get your momentum going, a San Diego psychologist at Therapy Changes can help. If you are struggling with finding the motivation to reach out for help, visit our Contact Us page and complete our quick and easy “contact us” form. Don’t lose your momentum – do it NOW before you close your device. You got this!

Photo by Bruno Nascimento on Unsplash